I'm Empty (poetry}

I'm Empty


I've lost emotion to trust;
but I do anyways,
not because I feel for others
but rather to see if I gain emotion
long lost feelings
for others so deep;
I can rarely say 
since everyone else speaks.

Too scared to live,
but too scared to die 
maybe this will be
the last time
I have to put on a smile
and act alright
no that's a lie,
I still need more time.

and maybe I do smile
and have genuine deep feelings;
but they've become so rare
I consider them a blessing;
and sometimes I feel like
others are better without me-
but they got these tricks up their sleeves
that always end up stopping me.

I play these aggressive games
to let my anger go
but it never seems to work;
my emotions never seem to show
and maybe it's a test-
to see how strong I am
but I'm so tired of it
I just can't stand this.

sometimes I have the urge to run away
somewhere far, far away
just to escape this prison
this hell of a life
but I know it'd only get worse
so that's why I always held a knife,
not for others,
but for my own miserable self.

sometimes the rain falls
and I feel sad,
but most of the time I can't tell

cause I always feel empty.

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